Thumb-out

Its that time of year when everybody makes resolutions and starts signing up for gym classes, diets and divorce lawyers. Yes! A new start! Today I’m going to let you now about the latest craze that seems to be seeing the worlds of fitness. Thumbing

At first it seems like a regular workout. First make sure you get clearance from your doctor, then recalibrate your nutritional intake, find a local gym (any gym will do), perhaps even get a personal trainer. Finally- make sure you buy the right stretchy gear and bring water to the gym.

Be careful not to push yourself too hard: you can build up over time but at first take it easy. Find a piece of equipment – perhaps the lat pull-down. Get comfortable. Are you ready? Now take out your phone and start thumbing.

Thumb your way through your 20 contacts in your address book. Breathe. Now look at say 30 emails: if you feel up to it try to send a reply or two. Take five. Now get back to the phone. Go through your Facebook and see if you feel able post 10 likes. Feel the burn.

At this stage you might be feeling pretty tired but its a mistake to compare yourself to the other thumbers whizzing through their routines. Sure some of them can sit at the equipment and thumb for an hour with only minimal hydration but that’s not for you. Yet.

Now instagram. Look at maybe 50 pictures. Like some, follow others. Thumb, thumb, thumb like you mean it. If you’re strong enough you might even DM some but don’t overdo it.

Finally for the real athletes you might check your twitter account. Comment briefly but to the max! Its important not to get too absorbed in any kind of dialogue. This is a thumb-out after all and not a real exchange.

By now you’ll be exhausted. Its not unusual for the session to end with you taking a selfie and maybe even posting it. Hi 5 the athlete hitting his phone too. You both feel proud: why not!

Now wipe down the gear and get in the shower. You deserve it. A solid hours thumbing has taken it out of you. If you keep at it you’ll eventually develop the sort of gladiator thumbs the gym rats have but for now take pride in taking the first step to total digital fitness.

Keep it up!